How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
