no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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