Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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