I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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