I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
