kristin has been a bad kristin
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize