at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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