Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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