Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize