I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i just had sex bonerless
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
