butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
