ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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