I hate all girls vehemently.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
