Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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