At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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