I'd wear matching sweaters with you
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize