I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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