of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
