Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
