so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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