remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
