I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
