Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
