I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
