Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
