is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
