so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
