All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
