seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
