take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I think your dad took our porno
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
