Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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