Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize