I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
My dick has a subreddit
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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