so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize