Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
