is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
