she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
