I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
