# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
