Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
