Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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