remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
