I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
