You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize