I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
