R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
did you just send me my own nude
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
