You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
He told me they were just razor bumps!
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
