I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
