i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
