Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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