kristin has been a bad kristin
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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